How do I keep on the food plan when husband wants pizza?

[KathleenGD]

Just started 2 days ago and keeping with the program.  He is very skinny and I need to lose >100 lbs.  I told him to go out to 5 guys or go out and get some supper as I sure don't want a pizza around.  I'm going to make myself a grilled cheese.  That's not enough for him. 

Suggestions?

[FitKnight]

I would explain to him how important it is for you to get healthy and lose the weight. He should be able to be sensitive to your situation and adjust his diet accordingly. Contrary to popular opinion, spouses can eat different things at the same meal (I have friends who struggle with this, too). If you make the meals, maybe make him one thing and you another; it's more work, sure, but it'll make sure that you're getting the nutrients you require and not just succumbing to what's easy.

For what it's worth, I would also recommend skipping the grilled cheese sandwich next time, that's a lot of processed carbs and fatty dairy. 😞

[Carson]

If you're trying to lose weight, how about trying to eat Paleo? I don't know if you've heard of it, but I know several people who have lost a ton of weight by cutting out grains, legumes, and sugar, and increasing intake of meat, veggies, and healthy fats (like coconut and avocado).

I'm not married, so I can't say for sure about the husband thing...I would just ask him to eat out if he wants the gross stuff, like you did.

Hope this helps!

[Emmjay]

That is a hard one.  I had a girlfriend like that as well, and she could never lose the weight.  Could you perhaps buy diet dinners for yourself to start and then serve him a real dinner with potatoes and you just have the protein and salad. I have signifcant allergies and often have to cook separate things for my husband, so it is doable.  Perhaps it would be helpful to consult a dietician for menu ideas.

[steff]

Okay, here's what I do, for what it's worth.  I fix a meal and alter my part. Say, I am making a homemade pizza.  For him, I make a medium size pizza and a salad.  For me, I take my pizza toppings and I put them in a nonstick skillet and melt them together.  That way, I have my pizza toppings but I lose the crust.  Or say I am making chicken breasts in gravy...I bake the chicken and then put his in the sauce or gravy and make a veggie and/ or a salad and a baked potato for him.  I skip the sauce and potato and eat the veggies and one chicken breast.  See, you can even do it with burgers.  Skip the fries and have a salad, skip the bun and eat it with as fork.  You can adjust anything with just a bit of thought.

[datto54]

I eat very differently to my partner, but my theory is its important to me, so I make the changes I need, no discussion, he still has his usuals, and I change out what I dont eat. I eat mostly paleo, so we usually have the same protien component, and he just has oven chips, rice, or pasta with his and ill have a big pile of veg, salad or shirataki noodles (plus veg) with mine. He is happy, and has naturally become more concious of what I eat cos he sees that ive gone and made the required changes without a big song and dance about it all. (Not saying that your doing that, im sure your not :)) 

Hubby is now super on board because he has seen me lose 45 kgs, and he now has a hottie on his arm. Im more confident and it flows through both our lives, 

Just my two cents 🙂 

[Natalie]

When preparing meals, I have to consider my husband as well as my 3 kids.  Each of us has different needs and wants when it comes to food. Rather than seeing what everyone eats as an issue, causing people to eat separately, turn meals into an experience which everyone gets a choice and no-one is left out.

I try to keep the protien the same for everyone each meal (not the same serving size of cause), then set up a type of buffet of side options. Last night for example I cooked fish then offered Potato bake, baked pumpkin, sauted mushrooms, mixed salad vege's (tomato, lettuce leaves, cucumber & capsicum).  Everyone was made to take at least 2 options, serving size up to each person.  No complaints were had and very little left overs

[shunt]

When I was with my son's father he purposly sabotaged me. He would refuse to eat anything remotely healthy. And he is still very skinny. He would bring home fast food not just for himself but for me as well. He would bully me into eating it as it was a waste if I didnt. He would whine that when I exercised I never spent any time with him anymore. Im not saying that this is what is happening. However, you need to take care of yourself too! You deserve to be happy and healthy. You deserve to be supported in your endevours. And sometimes you just have to put your health first over other peoples "wants"

I hope you all the best 🙂

[Jami]

Good discussion. Sometimes hubbies like the status quo and get nervous if their wives set out to improve themselves. I do think the best thing to do is change your entire household diet to a healthy one, and hubby can just eat more. My husband and I are both on a low carb, no sugar, high fat diet. He loves that food. He isn't counting any calories and is halfway through his second box of brie cheese in one week. He lost 6 pounds. I'm working at it a lot harder than he is and while I wish my weight loss were better, with 11 pounds off over a 7 week period, it's pretty acceptable. Please look into the low carb diet options - there are many different versions of it to suit your family's tastes ... Paleo, South Beach, Atkins, Gundry, LCHF (Low Carb High Fat). For those of us who spent decades feeling guilty about every gram of fat we ever ate, low carb is refreshingly filling and flavorful.

[lexiemelo]

I also have a skinny husband who eats a LOT. I usually make a protein, carb and veggie for dinner. I get one serving of protein, he gets two. I get 1/2 serving of carbs, he gets 1-2. I get 2 servings of veggies he gets 1/2 - 1. I make proteins that we both like, and everyone is happy! 

We probably do pizza once a month. If you have one slice with a large salad you can fit it into your diet. If you like to cook it's easy to make homemade pizza too. If you have control over the amount of cheese on the pizza the calories can get under better control. OR you can make little mini pizzas out of english muffins or pita breads for yourself and let him eat the "normal" pizza.

cooking light dot com has a lot of husband-friendly yet light meals! good luck 

[Iseulte]

I like to make healthy options of the unhealthy meals - change out the hamburger for ground turkey where you can get by with it (tacos are perfect for this), make flatbread pizza instead of ordering the unhealthy kind, and really learn how to use spices.

My husband even got into learning how to cook healthier once it got to be fun.  Change is hard for people.  Nobody wants to feel deprived, even you.  So make it interesting. Balsalmic vinegar on a spinach salad with strawberries, walnuts, sliced flank steak and a sprinkle of gorgonzola feels decadent without breaking the calorie bank. 

[kflannery]

you can always lighten up current recipes...my husband has never had a weight problem, his weight changes by maybe a pound in a year(should be against the law) so when he has a baked potatoe i have a baked small sweet potatoe plain...i use ground turkey in place of ground beef in chile and other dishes....i fill up on veg and have smaller portions of meat and other things...i still make rice but have about 1/4 the portions size he does...it is about eating smarter and portion control....and a grilled cheese isn't the answer....i go out to fast food places sometimes, have water to dring and don't eat the bread from the sandwich..it can work, get creative....

[nottaken101]

Yes, the sabotage problem happens a lot.

Could there be some reason that the original poster's husband doesn't want her to lose weight? Does he like being the skinny one? 

If so, that needs to be addressed, in my humble opinion.

[Marcy]

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@nottaken101 wrote:

Yes, the sabotage problem happens a lot.

Could there be some reason that the original poster's husband doesn't want her to lose weight? Does he like being the skinny one? 

If so, that needs to be addressed, in my humble opinion.

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A husband should be able to eat what he wants in his own home regardless of his eating choices.  Don't blame the husband for sabotaging a wife's dieting efforts.  That gives her an excuse to fail.  A woman should take full responsibility for having the self-control to eat properly.  Temptations will be everywhere anyway not just at home.  

[Jim_M]

If your husband won't eat what you're cooking, you can buy him a cookbook and let him make his own food.  After about a week, he'll be happy with anything he doesn't have to cook himself!

[steff]

Oh yea, that approach is going to end well. 

Spoiler

[nottaken101]

My comment was about deliberating sabotaging a woman's attempt to become thinner and healther, not the right of man to eat whatever he wants in his own castle. 

If a spouse just wants to eat whatever he/she wants in the house that's one thing, I suppose.

However, if a spouse is outright sabotaging a dietary change because he/she is afraid that once the partner gets thinner they'll be more attractive to others, that's another issue, in my view.

Losing weight upsets the status quo respecting friends and family. 

When I started losing weight, I was surprised by how many people didn't want me to succeed because they wanted me to be the fat friend that made them look good. 

I've said my peace. 🙂

[nottaken101]

 "Don't blame the husband for sabotaging a wife's dieting efforts."

Actually, I will. The original poster is not trying to lose 5 lbs. She's 100+ lbs overweight which is leading/probably already has led to serious life-threatening health issues.

If your spouse is willing to put you in an early grave, by sabotaging your diet, so he can eat as much unhealthy food as he wants at home, I think it's time to take a careful look at the health of the relationship in general.

[Inga]

Is there some reason why he can't have pizza at the same table as you? Isn't that what you do at a restaurant-  Each order what you want?

Or if a grilled cheese is "on plan", what is so different about pizza, why not have a small salad and a small slice of pizza that will fit your calorie profile for the day? 

[steff]

I am not sure going to deliberate sabotage is a concern.   Because then the question of who is doing the deliberate sabotage comes into play, the wife with 100 plus lbs to lose was going to have a grilled cheese sandwich.   She would have been better off with the burger or the pizza!   They at least have some veggies and enough protein to slow down the sugar reaction of the bread.  Maybe, the guy wants his lady to stop eating so many empty carbs.  Afterall, we only have one side of this "argument".  And as Dr. Phil would say, "It doesn't matter how flat you make a pancake, it still has two sides!"