How much is good for my 12 year old son to lose for weight?

[MaxIsAwesome]

My son that's almost turning 13 and is 5 foot 9, weighs around 130 pounds, is wanting to lose weight since he is, "Fat" he says. He wants to lose weight. I am wondering what a good diet would be for him and how many pounds he should try to lose every week. Thanks for your tips, etc!

[Raviv]

He may be cofusing lack of muscle tone with being "fat."

I would try to get him involved in some kind of sport, whatever he seems the most interested in, and see if it works itself out that way.

[WendyB]

I agree.

I would ask the Dr if he really needs to lose weight as it does not sound like it.

[Mermaid3011 · Accepted solution]

Hi there! 

So... I have looked up your son's BMI on a specific site for kids and teens, offered through the CDC Nutritional Division. (link: http://nccd.cdc.gov/dnpabmi/Calculator.aspx)

This is the result: 

Based on the height and weight entered, the BMI is 20.4, placing the BMI-for-age  at the 73rd percentile for boys aged 13 years. This child has a healthy weight.

Your son does not need to lose weight and he is not "fat". I can understand that he may not take your word for an answer, but he may accept the opinion of a doctor or even a personal trainer at the local YMCA or gym. 

I agree that enrolling him in a sport he enjoys and teaching him a healthy and balanced lifestyle with real, whole, natural food and home cooked meals, will not only make him happier (endorphines) it will also make the teenager years a little easier if he is with peers and enjoying some time outside.

I am very sorry to hear that your son thinks he is fat. It only shows that body image and dysmorphic body image is not only something girls can suffer from, but boys just the same.

I wish you all the best on your journey! 

[iMike]

Normally, I would tell any guy who is 5'7" and 130lbs he is not fat.  I am 5'7" and my "ideal weight," even though I've got a wider frame is between 140-150lbs.  The difference is I'm 37 years old.  At 13 your son is still has a few years to hit another growth spurt.  Also, the body of a teenager requires different things than the body of a fully-formed adult.

It's also VERY important that at such a young age he learn to develop a good self body image.  The last thing you want is a 13 year old child to develop an eating disorder or develop a poor sense of self-worth.  If your son is telling you he wants to lose weight, I would do two things.  First, tell him that you're taking him to the family doctor for a general physical and check-up.  Ask the doctor if he is, in fact, too big.  Like I said, at 130lbs and 5'7" he's likely just the right size, but since he's a kid it's best a doctor make the determination.  If the doctor actually says your son could stand to lose a little weight, then perhaps the best thing is for BOTH of you to sit down with a nutritionist, take a look at what he's eating, and also take a look at his activity level.

Talk to his doctor.

[DominicJ]

I wouldnt go for weight loss, he might still have some growing.

If he is concerned, push "fitness"

http://www.argos.co.uk/static/Product/partNumber/9017355.htm

Something like that is an easy and cheap starter, metal plates are MUCH better than plastic,

Theres a "British Army Fitness" android app thats quite good too.

[sage1]

It sounds like he has an eating disorder. Using sport, exercise and good foods as a solution usually just reinforces the disorder. He needs professional help, not a sports club.

[Bobbinyc]

I tend to agree.  Sports can go either way, and you did not say he is athletic.  Maybe the whole family could look at how they eat and how active they are, but I wouldn't put it on him.  His body will keep changing for a few years and he may become anything - skinny, chunky, muscular, who knows?  I would do some hard thinking about his self esteem - does it lag in any part of his life? is he a perfectionist?  is he socially comfortable with acquaintances and close friends (tough for some 13 year olds).  is he down on himself in any other way?  did he get this idea because of a social issue at school - being excluded or picked on?  is anyone at home overly concerned with their body and appearance?  etc.  Just sending a kid to a therapist is tough - they can make it into a very negative shameful thing.  Has anyone, like either parent, shared with him their own difficulties as a young teen? and how they overcame it?  Does he have reasonable coping skills that can get him through this?  

[Raviv]

I wouldn't go into a panic about it.  I doubt you'll find very many teenagers (or adults, for that matter) that are thrilled with thier bodies.  It's just life.

See how thing sgo.  If it's just a Gripe of the Week kind of thing, then it's just part of growing up and being aware of how others might perceive you.  If there are behaviors that are harmful or spiralling downward, like disordered eating or withdrawing from activities previously enjoyed, then you might want to take a closer look.

[youngWerther]

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@DominicJ wrote:

http://www.argos.co.uk/static/Product/partNumber/9017355.htm

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For kids:  Strength training, not weightlifting.    I guess that's because they already have huge growing stress.