Discouraged after a single "cheat" meal....help to avoid over analyzing my diet.

[EMerkle]

Starting weight: 284.

Lowest weight (Feb 2017) 179

Currently: 214

I gave up on my gym routine and gained more weight back than I ever wanted...and now that I'm back at it, I'm having a hard time not feeling discouraged when I allow myself a high calorie meal. I had pizza for lunch as a date with my husband, and now I feel like my whole day has been shot.

I eat healthy 90% of the time...just wish I didn't feel so overwhelmed mentally when it comes to food choices. 

[Daves_Not_Here]

Welcome @EMerkle , and 3 words:  HANG IN THERE!!  I think most everybody here has experienced similar emotions and setbacks.  Personally, I was at 170, ballooned up to 240, and felt horrible, both physically and mentally.

Here's a trick that's been working for me - it might work for you, especially if you are of a similar psychotic bent (No guarantees if you are sane):  my goal is NOT to avoid high calorie meals, and is NOT to eat healthy most of the time (So far so good?  This works for me as I have no willpower, no self-control, and no other virtues of character).  The first thing I do is just log everything I eat, crappy as it may be, and compare it against what Fitbit says I burn.  (It's either higher or lower, doesn't matter, you just need data).

Next step: consider there are errors in these measurements.  Briefly.  Then ignore the errors henceforth and forevermore.  Laugh at the errors, and all the people who complain about the errors (Of course there are measurement errors, welcome to the physical world).  Read all the posts complaining that reality happens and chuckle while feeling superior.

Next step: set up a food plan so that you eat about 1,000 calories less than you burn MOST, NOT ALL days.  Some days you might be at 500 calories deficit, others you might be at 1,500, but keep this up and you accumulate 7,000 calories deficit per week, or 2 pounds of weight lost.  (Hint: eat avocados and drink water to kill your appetite)

Next step:  Occasionally PIG OUT, GUILT FREE.  Think about it -- if you go on a complete face-stuffing bender for one meal, how many excess calories can you actually consume?  An entire pizza might be  2,000 calories and a half-gallon of ice cream is 2,200.  Inject one of these into an otherwise 1,000 calorie deficit day, and you're over for the day by only 500 to 1,000 calories (As they will replace some of the other things you would have eaten).  If you do this twice a week, you go from 7,000 to 5,000 calories of deficit, so what?  (Plus, some people will tell you that the occasional cheat meal will increase your metabolism, which I personally put in the same bunk category with tooth fairies and catastrophic global warming but hey, if it means I can rationalize binge-eating, I'm a believer!)

Next step:  post a self-indulgent rant in the Fitbit Community.

Anyway, that's my advice: now that you're paying attention to your health and trying to do the right things, screw the guilt and enjoy your indulgences!

[MagsOnTheBeach]

Did you plan on the pizza out?  If it was unplanned, that can escalate negative feelings.  Just remember that what is really important is your next meal, make a plan for it so you feel prepared and in control.

[Dominique]

Consistency always beats perfection: doing mostly the right things (doesn’t have to be perfect) most of the time (doesn’t have to be all the time) is what brings results. Eating a pizza once in a while is not going to ruin your efforts, providing your eating is on point the rest of the time.

Also: weight loss really is a numbers game. Overeating healthy food will cause you to gain weight, undereating junky food will result in weight loss. Not that I’m advocating eating junk food for weight loss, quite the contrary: you should try to eat mostly healthy foods in the right amounts (portion control!), with a bit of junky foods (again, in controlled amounts) every now and then being allowed. 

[DavidSchneier]

Traditional NY-style pizza is roughly 275 calories per slice. Most of us usually cap it at two slices per meal, which puts you at around 500 calories (I usually don't eat the crust and subtract 10% as a result). But even if you went all deep-dish with meat toppings, you're probably somewhere around 750-1,000 calories. Assuming you're somewhere near 2,000 per day to maintain your current weight that's not anything to beat yourself up over.

Dave has it right, track your numbers and adjust accordingly. One "bad" meal doesn't necessarily mean a  "bad" day and it definitely doesn't mean a "bad" week. Assuming you're looking at 8,500 calories per week to consistently lose weight and somewhere closer to 14,000 to maintain, anywhere in the middle is fine.

Learn how to enjoy a decadent meal without fearing it signals the onset of rapid, morbid obesity. 

[SunsetRunner]

@EMerkle Looking back I experienced a similar way of thinking, however, "cheat meal" didn't have such an impact on my diet. I totally understand and now I can tell you - don't worry. First of all, stop calling it "cheat". It helps. It's just a meal, maybe a treat but you're not cheating as long as you acknowledge you ate it. It's not suddenly going to destroy everything 🙂 Moreover, such treats from time to time may work to keep you motivated and on track. You may try to put a little bit of control into it and for example, knowing you're having a high-calorie meal, then just eat it less. Take away remaining or if you don't mind, just leave it ( it may actually make you feel better, feel being in control ). One day is NOTHING for weight loss or weight gain. There is absolutely no reason to feel bad about it. If it happened to me that I was eating out, I tried to convince my wife to go to the place I can find less calories-packed meals and menus with nutritional information. It didn't always work so for example, when I was having veggie lasagna, I ate half of it. I picked smaller meals or ate smaller portions. Even, as you call it "cheating" doesn't necessarily mean "out of control". Retaining a bit of control will make you feel happy and still enjoy eating out.

[Baltoscott]

Hi @EMerkle 

Your weight loss last year of 100+ lbs is amazing!  And of course you are freaked out about gaining some of it back.  That's what we all fear!  Maintenance after a big loss is HARD, and a "cheat" meal probably just amplifies the feeling that your body is back on autopilot and you are not in control. 

The first step is to just stop thinking of it as a cheat meal.  You and your husband like pizza and you are going to eat it once and a while.  Get a salad beforehand and go a little smaller on the pie than usual.  Once you've eaten enough, pick off one of two of any good bits that are left and leave the rest at the restaurant.  (Might have to get some buy-in from your hubby on that, but part of eating healthy is negotiating with family).  

The next step is to evaluate what you were doing last year to lose weight and re-incorporate some of the habits you were doing then to what you will do for the rest of your life.  You did it before and you can do it again.  And congrats on getting back to the gym!  Enjoy it now, the place will be PACKED next month!

[EmjayH]

Look at ur calorie deficient on a weekly base if it's easier. Even if you splurge out 1 day as long as ur in a deficient for the week it's nothing to stress over. Calorie cycling is beast and a great way to compensate for unplanned meals out. If ur really worried then just add an extra workout to ur week. We're all here to improve our lives. But improving still means living lol. Can't always sweat the small stuff

[emili]

I know you put cheat in quotes- but I really think most people consider it cheating. On whom or on what I have no idea. You set the rules for what you eat, you eat what you choose to eat, so where does the cheat come in? As most have said, it isn't cheating if you plan for it. When I was losing, I knew that on Friday and Saturday I would have higher calorie intake than the rest of the week. For you its pizza- for me its fresh crusty yummy yeasty bread, beer and nachos. I ensured a decent deficit all week and cardio'd a serious sweat on Saturdays and Sundays to burn through and sweat out as much of it as I could. I still do all this today, three years later. Weight loss and maintenance is planning, planning and more planning. If you and your husband have date day once per week and you have a girlfriend outing the next day, your week leading up to it should be lean and the day of even leaner. Then put on your favorite heels, brightest lipstick and go have fun.

[Arynna33]

You've gotten some real sound advice here, so I won't parrot any of it.  I'm jumping into these forums after Weight Watchers made changes I just can't condone - so I'll get support on a free app already on my phone and available on my PC, right? High calorie meals/days will happen - but one won't derail the big picture.  It's a marathon, not a sprint.  I could write a novel about fake weight gain (water retention) and how it takes an extra 3500 calories to gain 1 pound of FAT... so use those numbers to allow yourself to remember it's not a pound of fat after the pizza...but water retention, and it will fall of very shortly after being back to your 90% normal. Also, allow yourself the freedom to enjoy that splurge meal guilt free.  Plan it.  Plan around it.  Don't starve yourself before hand.  Have your healthy breakfast, have your snack - it helps portion control the splurge. You've got this.  Tell those voices in your head they won't win.  Trust the waistband more than the number on the scale. 🙂