Not hungry, but dang-it I'm never full either.

[TravellingSunny]

I'm at the half way point in my weight loss journey, and I'm getting the first twinges of doubt.  I've heard that in order to be successful with this, it needs to be a "lifestyle" change.  Makes sense - I don't want to work so hard to lose the weight only to be faced with gaining it all back.

But, what if I don't like the new lifestyle?  What if I end up being skinny and unhappy?

I'm super-lucky that I actually prefer healthy foods.  I'm not a vegetarian, but when it comes to meat, I just prefer chicken over beef.  Salads are one of my favorite dishes, and I'm a total veggie and fruit junkie.  For me, the added weight came not from what I was eating, but how much I was eating and how little I was moving.

Two months later, and I eat all day long - little amounts - to space it out.  I eat on average 1,300 calories per day, and I burn on average 2,300 calories per day.  I'm not hungry all the time, so that's awesome.  But, I'm never full.  I miss being full.  I miss it a lot.  Not Thanksgiving dinner full - but comfortably, sleepily, just had a fantastic meal full.  What does this mean?  Am I going to feel like I'm missing that feeling forever?  I'm worried that it's going to push me right back into my old habits if I don't wrap my head around this one and make my peace with it.

[Ukase]

I think it's important for you to know that these thoughts are so normal; or at least, so much like mine, you could be a blood relative. 

So, what kind of lifestyle can you live with? This is a tough question, because the future is unknown and unknowable. 

My best advice is to plan out your meals and forget about how you’re going to feel about it later. 

How do you feel about it now? Are you incorporating a “cheat meal” in your current schedule? 

If not, you should either plan one, either every week or every two weeks, or simply give in every once in a while and forgive yourself. It's okay. This is your life, not your sole reason to exist. Eat to live, not live to eat! (although, my upbringing in New Orleans disagrees with this to an extent) 

It's okay to gorge every now and then, as long as it's not 4 or 5 times a week. Just keep tabs on the consumption. 

[TravellingSunny]

Do you really think these are normal thoughts?  I mean, I figured if I was committed to this whole healthy lifestyle thing, then sticking with it when I can just work on maintaining the loss should be easy.  But, the longer I go through this process, the more I worry that this isn't something I can maintain. 

I haven't given myself any "cheat" days.  Someone somewhere mentioned that if it's a lifestyle change, then I shouldn't feel like I need to cheat.  I should be living the life I wanna live.  But, the life I wanna live includes a lot of cakes and pies and doughnuts and fudge and oh my goodness I miss all of it!  I DID, however, have a slugfest this weekend and barely moved off the couch.  But, even through that, I still managed to keep my calories in less than my calories out.  And I was miserable.  😞

How often can folks have cheat days and still lose weight (or maintain once they get where they want to be?)  Is once a month too much?  What does cheating look like?  A special dessert?  A whole cheat meal?  (Oh, what I wouldn't do for a heavy Italian dish with bread!)  A free-for-all day?  See?  I haven't even decided to have a cheat day, and I'm already trying to push the envelope.  It might not be safe for me.  LOL!

[Dave001]

Like many people, I struggle to distinguish between hunger and thirst. 

I find that drinking a pint or two of water or fruit squash when I think I'm hungry often sates me for a while.

It turns out that hydration is vital!

Perhaps you could try this too?

[TravellingSunny]

I've increased the amount of water I drink, and I do try to drink a cup of water before a meal to help take up some tummy room, but it doesn't ever give me that "full" feeling.  It's possible I could get there with even more water.  I'll try it this week and see...

[Esya · Accepted solution]

Also this is your current weight loss calory deficit and won't be your maintainance diet. So when you get to maintainance, you get to eat more if you keep working out at the same level. You are running 1000 calories deficit from what I read in your first post. If you are having a hard time, maybe add 250 calories a day (or 500) for a while or on days that you are struggling. Ofcourse it will slow the weight loss down, but you will still be losing weight and that is most important. It is a marathon, so do it in a way that you can last. We all want to get to the finish line as quickly as possible, but we should not perish on the way getting there by treating a marathon as a sprint.

[TravellingSunny]

@Esya - I completely agree.  Honestly, I didn't realize I was running such a large deficit until I actually had to put it in writing here.  My food plan is set for a 500 calorie deficit, but I worry about eating "all of my calories" before the end of the day, so I tend to still have about a thousand calories left to eat in my "budget" after work.  Add in the extra calories I get when I do strength training at home and my super-huge, 500+ calorie dinner salad, and I still have extra calories at the end of the day that I could eat - but I'm on the way to bed.

It's been working - eating pretty much the same things in the same quantities every day, so maybe I'll add an extra 50 calories to each of my meals (there's like six a day now, LOL) and that might get me closer to the 500 calorie deficit I'm shooting for.

[elderwanda]

A 1000 calorie/day deficit is really more appropriate for someone who burns a lot more calories.  If you cut calories more than about 20% of what you burn each day, it really starts to take a toll after a bit.  I don't remember where I read that, but it seems to have been true for me.  I'm burning about 1900 per day, and sure enough, if I eat fewer than about 1600, I feel pretty hungry and deprived.  (Actually, these days I feel hungry and deprived if I eat fewer than about 2000, but I'm pretty close to my healthy weight at this point.)

It's a bum deal for people who have a lot of fat to lose but who don't burn much (like my short, elderly mother---poor thing probably burns no more than 1500 calories a day, and needs at least that much for the nutrition).  But slow and steady wins the race.