Being judged for walking by myself.

[repcosy]

I am very new to Fitbit and im now trying to get my fitness levels up since quitting smoking. I have being trying to get my step numbers up and had some spare time, so I went for a walk through a local woodlands that leads to a beautiful reservoir. No dog, no kids, just me on my own. I'm 30 years. I came across two others ladies who seem horrified and judged me for walking on my own. I at this point felt quite uncomfortable and left quite quickly. 

My question is does this happen a lot to others? 

Should I always be walking with someone to prevent this happening? 

I didn't expect this at all! 

Any advice would be appreciated. 

[cindynelson]

Actually I always walk, run and go to the gymn by myself. One of my co-workers wanted to go to the gymn with me and after my 15 minute warm up, she wanted to leave. She left and I stayed a couple of hours more and finished my workout.

I also  usually go out of the country alone on vacation. Most of the people I know don't speak the languages I do and I am not willing to explain everything nor go to the tourist attractions they want to wait in line to see. The last time I went to Europe with a friend it was a disaster. Lately I have been going to South America rather than Europe

[Callytimecat]

I do the majority of my walking by myself and rarely encounter any problems even though I live in a big city. There are people who are judgemental though - some people worry about walking alone but we all decide what feels safe - it isn't really for anyone else to decide. A few years ago when I was walking home from work - quite a long route - about 7 km/4.5 miles at the time - and I noticed this guy kept appearing in front, trying to talk to me. It was after dark, and quite disconcerting. I took some detours to my usual route, but then realised he was following me in his car - moving on - parking up and reappearing. I managed to frighten him off when I found a phone box (I didn't have a cellular phone at the time). The next day colleagues suggested I report it to the police, in case this man was harassing others. At the station the officer who recorded my report asked me to point out my route on the map and he said that one neighbour I walked through was a red light area and he advised me against walking through there alone at night. I avoided it for a while, which meant adding more steps - and now the area has been redeveloped, and doesn't feel so bad for walking alone through after dark.

[repcosy]

I too have had this experience many years ago when I was walking home. It does set you on edge, but it also makes you more aware of your surroundings. 

Thank you for sharing, Stay safe! 

[eirippe]

About 9 months ago I was new to walking and exercising. I was always alone and those snobby rich ladies would  give me nasty stares and people even yelled horrible slurs at me. I decided to invest in an armband for my phone and some fitness headphones that stay on. The best thing I ever did was walk or run with music! I dont look at anyone or even acknowledge them now. I now run 3-6 miles a day and I dont even acknowledge anyone around me because I am focused on my music! You can do it!

[Samsezcool]

It is very good as long as you are in a safe place. I hope there wont be any issues like thefts or any bad guys hanging around there. You are always free to move for your own good. 

Happy stepping.. 🙂 

[Callytimecat]

The problem with listening to music on headphones is not being aware of surroundings and traffic. My experience of walking in large cities is most people don't interact with each other anyway, except if it's someone you know in the immediate neighbourhood. However, in rural areas many more people are friendly and say 'hello', and it's a thing I like - the sense of community. Headphones can have an isolating effect and exacerbate the fragmented lives that communications technology encourages in our lifestyles. It might be different in other countries but that's what I've observed. On the rare occasions when I hear a negative comments which I think might be directed at me because I am by myself I do my best not to let the aggressor (if that's what they are) know: I try not to react. Which is probably the same effect as wearing headphones, but without. To a large extent we can choose what we react to and what we want to ignore - and when it comes to other people trying to project their own unhappiness, onto us, I think avoiding them/keeping away is a good idea if possible.

[SevenAteNine]

Hi Rep, I'm also in the UK and have walked on my own in the countryside since I was about 15. I would recommend that you continue doing so, I have always found it safe and other walkers some of the friendliest people you can meet. And at least we don't have to worry that they might be carrying a gun

In what way did you feel judged by them? Might be worth exploring your feelings and reactions around this..?

[repcosy]

I aboslutely agree about the whole sense of community part! 

Although I live in a little villiage, its just off set from a city centre so you somewhat feel like your far enough away from city life, but close enough to still access it within 15 minutes. Our villiage has always had that sense of community spirt where everyone greets each other, but up until recently things have started to change in our area which is really sad. 

[repcosy]

It was the tone and expression i was spoken to in, particually the mother.  I think they thought I was up to no good. I'm not quite sure what she thought I was doing. 

I use to walk in the country myself in the pitch black with the worst torch! (with friends) Now that was a challenge. Those were my star gazing late teen years!  

[SevenAteNine]

They may well have been suspicious. In certain areas, when you walk there regularly you get to know familiar faces, and someone without children or a dog does stick out a bit. I know when I had a dog, I too kept an eye out for more vulnerable, fellow dog-walkers.

[rohmkl03]

Congratulations on quitting smoking! It takes a ton of determination and I'm glad you picked up walking to help get back into a healthy route!

As for the two women- I won't worry about it. What is important is to continue with a workout routine (walking, running, etc). I'm 28 weeks pregnant and with working full time, getting my masters, and a toddler at home; the only time I can work out is at night after the toddler goes to sleep. Sometimes I take the dog- sometimes just myself. Given how busy my life is, I don't always have my headphones in or just 1 in to stay aware of my surroundings. 

The most thing is to keep up with the walking and feel good about yourself! Keep it up!

[Syty]

You know your environment so just be safety aware.  Places, time of day and amount of other people.  But so long as you are comfortable don't worry about what others think.

When my wife or child wants to walk I welcome it as I enjoy it more, but as far as fitness I actually get more when I am alone because I go at my pace and work toward my goals. 

Also, don't read too much into the look they gave you.  Could of been bad timing and they were talking about something that warranted the look at the same moment they passed you.  Maybe you had garbage stuck to your shoe and didn't know it.  Maybe they didn't like your clothing (just had a elderly woman ask my wife if she was going swimming.  Turns out she said it because my wife had a shirt with very short sleeves and she thought that wasn't lady like).  Point is you never know what the look was for.

Enjoy yourself and good on you for being out there.

[AngieFromDelray]

Hum, I would pity them that they feel they need another person to be active and enjoy life.  No one has the right to judge you for what you choose to do.  People have a tendency to be closed minded and only accept what they themselves have experienced in life.  Kudos to you for being self sufficient and comfortable in your own company.  I am pretty sure those that judge you also can't eat alone, go to the movies alone, go to the bathroom alone... you get my drift.  You are a true adventurer and don't follow the masses, good for you! 

[repcosy]

Thank you! It certainly wasnt the easiest thing to give up, but defintely the best habit ive broken! i feel so much healthier for it and im working on improving that even more so! 

It defintely sounds like you have your hands ful! I'm sure your little one keeps you on your toes! 

Take care and look after yourself! Good luck withy the pregancy! 

[MagsOnTheBeach]

I almost always walk alone too - one thing I have noticed is that if I keep a good pace and keep my chin up a little, that I just nod when people pass.  I try to look confident and keep a good stride.  I don't need to explain anything to strangers.  I walk on quiet paths but there are runners and walkers every so often so it doesn't feel desolate.  Do the walk for you and put side those women!

[TurquoiseTurtle]

I walk alone every day.  I have a husband, kids, and a dog, but I prefer to walk alone.  It's good thinking time. I always see lots of other people walking alone around here.  I would have never thought it to be an odd thing.  

[WendyB]

Really?  I walk on my own every day. I run in to all kinds of things. Skunks, coyotes, dogs who want to jump on me.

Do I need someone to walk with. NO! I have met many walkers and talked to them as well. I don't want to rely on someone meeting me at such and such time it never happens.

Give me peace

WTG on the smoking!

[DanielleinDC]

I live in a city and walk by myself all the time. I live across the street from a nice urban park and when the weather is nice will go walking there for exercise. I also have an opportunity to get steps in between buses on my morning commute. The only time someone ever said something was today, when some older woman asked me if I was okay. But once I told her I was getting my steps in, she understood.

I have my headphones not only so I can walk to the music but so people (mostly) leave me alone. Since I'm in a well-populated area, I feel pretty safe.

To hell with what those ladies think. You were just getting in some "me time". 

And congrats on quitting smoking. 

[PulpFit]

Ignore them...don't look back...frenemies are everywhere...